------ Top 20 symptoms you are a dyed-in-the-wool Achaean ------

1) You woulde rather notte eat and frequently starve yourself half to death before you do
2) When you do eat, your favorite food is mutton chops
3) You sometimes fall asleep suddenly in the middle of important occasions
4) You do notte see the need for a bed
5) You take short cat-naps on the side of the street
6) You fall asleep while trying to propose to your girlfriend
7) You dream of worlde-domination
8) You dream of monopolising the rat-catching industry by building a super rat-catching machine
9) You go to church withe a pack full of dead elk
10) You cyn squeeze 10 dead elk into a tiny backpack
11) You special talent is kissing yourself, tongue dancing gracefully in your mouthe
12) You sleep in odd places - on treetops, in the sewers, floating in primal chaos
13) Uou have no trouble going to sleep and usually doze off the moment your head touches the sidewalk
14) You have a nagging suspicion that everyone arounde you knows your name and how olde you are even before you have met them
15) You name your dog, Beast of the Crypt
16) Your dog eats anything
17) Your dog is flatulent
18) You mysteriously disappear the moment you start writing down anything (man I wish i cyn do this in class)
19) Your father is a bird, your mother is a feline and your husband is a frog
20) Sometimes when you fall asleep for too long, you wake up to finde yourself 20 years older than you were before

Penned by my hand on the 12th of Valnuary, in the year 261 AF.