To whom it may concern,

If my apartment goes down because some Chaug-whatever-its-name-is stampedes over it with its nonexistent feet, I will bite everybody. Twice. On the ankles.

It also holds a lot of cheese. A LOT of cheese.

Sincerely,
Abysal Visindi

Penned by my hand on the 20th of Scarlatan, in the year 993 AF.