Archaosa,

I followed the advice I was given by experts in the laboratory, I shared it as openly as I could without identifying people who had very generously given us a chance to try. Ser Aerek gave Hashan and Eleusis a chance to try and recreate this. He didn't have to, he didn't have to say a word. His choice was heroic and I do not know what you think you are accomplishing by congratulating a failed siege that your Overseer and a few other citizens of Ashtan helped oppose right along with me.

He chose to act, to try and solve this, instead of the hoarding people accuse him of. His fear in doing so was well founded. People reacted exactly as predicted. I am ashamed for my part in realizing that prophesy.

But some of us do more than constantly shout about how unfair it is that people don't like us. Some of us push ourselves, strive, bend our minds to creativity to try and find solutions, to leave no stone unturned instead of treading the same paths.

There is a balance to be found in certain situations between what can be said and what can not be said. I tipped too far toward transparency, and I accept the fault.

I do not have the capacity to wait to be saved.

I do not have the stomach to be told to be a passenger to history, I do not ask anyone else do so either.

I believe in the power of mortals to write their own fate and if I can arm another to do so, I am inclined to do just that.

And I do not have the lack of self-awareness it requires to not see faults within myself and flaws in my decisions.

I will continue to work toward an ultimate solution to this problem, because that is who I am. I act, I try. And when my errors cause harm, I am accountable, and I will be part of the solution to the best of my ability.

You can resume your regularly scheduled petulant shouts about being misunderstood. I have fruit to find.

Countess Nezaya Visindi,
Witch

Penned by my hand on the 7th of Lupar, in the year 979 AF.