Dear Color Grey Senior, Esquire.

This is a declaration of war, hostilities, unpeace, unpleasantries,
crashed dinner parties, spoiled milk, egged houses, checkmate, and
yahtzee.

For too long have you plagued our lives with your dull greyness, your
indecision over one way or the other, and your generally bad bloodline
of being the bastard child of black and white. For too long has your
lack of vibrancy and your decoration in makeup upon he of the Face of
Grey gone unanswered for! For too long have my kilts been riding too low
and showing off my dainty crack because the only belts I could find were
the color of PURE SMELLY STINKY GREY.

Simply put, Grey, I'm a tad disappointed. You once had it in you to be a
color that had a purpose, a place, and a wife and 2.5 kids. As head of
the Sally Kissy Pants Foundation for Tightnessinpants Syndrome Victims
(SKPFTSV. Clever acronym, isn't it?), you must be put down like a bad
baker.

Know this, Grey! Gods help you if I should ever find you ina dark
alleyway, because I will throw a bucket of pink at you. And I'm not
talking about emptying the bucket onto you, I'm talking about leaving
the bucket closed and just chucking it at you. Kinda hard to be so
impartial with a big pink dent in your knickers, eh?

Know this, the color grey. You're as doomed as a grook in a pond in a
lightning storm. But keep in mind that you brought it upon yourself.

-Kuntar "I think I left my Sally Kissy in my other pants" Semshan,
Junior Junior Senior, Double Esquire.



P.S. You're not invited to my birthday party! You know who you are!

Penned by my hand on the 23rd of Glacian, in the year 448 AF.