Greetings, Sapience

I bring you a general message from Captain Squeakers who is my drinking
buddy and ally. He also suffers the unfortunate status of being a rat.
This in itself is not the unfortunate thing, it is the fact that every
other rat bears the acute problem of looking very much like him.

So for example, Squeakers will be enjoying a nice cocktail in the many
inns in the dingier parts of mysia. Proberably contracting/offering many
diseases to the ladies of the night around there, lucky git

anyway where was I? oh yes, then one of you guys come in and slay the
heck out of him. Now why would you do that to a poor pirate rat in his
element?

Sure, if mayhap you met him squeaking around in the streets of fish or
dueling the fabled marsh rats of Enverren you might be excused killing
him by mistake, but to cut down a rat in his homeland? Sometimes makes
me think the Vertani were right about us.

So an abridged version of "what to do/not do near squeakers" (the longer
version contains swearwords) Is now in written word for you all to see


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THE HOLY RULES OF SQUEAK
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I. Thou shalt not molest thy rats unless thy hast thy permit and rum

II. Thou shalt not kicketh thy rat kitoushe unless it beareh no loyalty
to Finchy, using thy PROBEeth

III. Thou shalt not use thy PROBEeth in the wrong contexteth

VI. Thou shalt give rum to thy rats before slaying.

V. Thou shalt not attempteth to offereth thy rat to thy local ratman,
Jorjeth will not eth taketh thyeth rat now, and I hopeth neither the
other ratmen/ladyeth

so there you have it. Short of it is, give me rum/dont kill squeakers

--Finchy

Penned by my hand on the 8th of Mayan, in the year 390 AF.