Greetings. Reading all these posts made me want to write a post of my
own. I do not wish to add, subtract, or augment any of what was said
before, because I consider most of it irrelevant. I look at Chaos and
other forms of spiritual (or religious) systems in a rather different
way.
There is nothing out there more important than that which is your true
Self, which represents your thoughts, memories, actions, feelings, and,
the most important, your CHOICES. No God, in his most outraged fury, can
chain your Self. You can be annahilated, mind-controlled, erased from
existence, imprisoned in the most Sisyphic fashion...but
nothing...NOTHING can ever compulse you to WILLINGLY surrender your
sense of Self. That is your choice. If you have surrendered your sense
of Self for the glory and mindless service of a God, so be it, whatever
blows your hair back. What I write is not for you, as one cannot
possibly converse or argue with a fanatic. The fanatic will always be
right, as he lives with an axiom that his belief is right.
Right and Wrong are useless concepts. We, imperfect mortals, cannot
construct such concepts, as we do not have the necessary immanence in
the world to be objective enough. And perfect Gods' objective statures
and declarations of Wrong and Right cannot serve as such to thinking
mortals, again, because our limitations and subjectivity do not allow us
to see the basis behind the Right and Wrong. Hence, we would have to
take it on Faith. Faith does not satisfy a mortal mind longing for
explanations. I live by an axiom that "A choice that leads to Evil is
more Divine than blind conformity to a virtue one does not comprehend".
Do we have anything else to live by then? Yes. We have an internal
rhythm, which pulses constantly. When we do something that is
*inauthentic* to our Self, that which is contrary to our nature, we feel
it...we feel something is wrong...Conversely, when we act according to
our nature, we feel accordingly. We can suppress this rhythm, but we
will always sense it, one way or another.
ql
Why do I choose Chaos then? Let me say it has nothing to do with history
of it, or any colorful mythologies assoiated with this or that. Chaos is
the mother of Revelation. I am given no rules, truths to live by, values
to uphold. I am given forms, and I, like a child playing with alphabet
cubes, construct my archetypal truths out of these primordial forms. I
stumble, I fall, but i learn, and I understand more and more...of MYSELF
primarily. As I mold my truths in the world, i understand more and more
of my drives, my rhythm, my SELF. The understanding, betterment, and
enjoyment of the SELF, i believe, is the meaning of Life.
ql
I will ask, in conclusion, a few rhetorical questions. If you worship a
book blindly, or live by a set of rules, or Codexs, or whatever, these
questions are not for you. But if you agree with my definition of the
meaning of life, then ask yourself this. Where else other than Chaos
would you be able to find your true Self? Where would you be allowed to
live buy YOUR truths, which you have come to treasure through long,
painful introspection, even if they are subjective. I guarantee you that
a choice and truth honestly derived from one's SELF can never be wrong.
It may be merely a billionth facet of the jewel of Truth, but it WILL be
a facet, and one that you understand, and one that you live by. Chaos is
not the DESTINATION. It is merely a WAY. To your SELF.

Never let anything take away your mental power to choose.

Penned by my hand on the 15th of Glacian, in the year 307 AF.