Welcome to the first edition of the ARTISINAL CRITIQUE in which we
review the art of each artisinal contest and discuss the strengths
and weaknesses of each piece. This is intended to help all those
who have entered, or aspire to enter the ARTISINAL CONTEST, in the
overall improvement of their finished pieces. Let us begin.

Firefox Portrait by Dream

Good points: A solid piece with good form and nice use of contrasts
of colors such as the red in the figure's hair against the prevelant
green of the painting. The shadowing is well done as is the
reflection of the light caused by the Druid calling lightning. Good
realism too.

Needs improvement: First off the lack of a background takes away
from this piece with the figure just floating in space. Also there
is a lack of energy in the figure and very little story telling is
shown by the pose. The hands grasping the staff could use more
work, and an increase in the size seen of the painting would help.

Shallam Gate by Naiad

Good points: Beautifully rendered night sky and the use of colors
draws the eye around the piece. The surrealism of the piece is
striking, likening to pre-selucar times. Use of the two dimensional
genre is exquisite, and the composition of each section of the
buildings jumps out at you. The shading throughout adds intrest and
helps the buildings and gate hold their own against the sky.

Needs improvement: The mirror quality of the piece from left to
right detracts from its overall impact. Slight changes on either
half would go a long way to improving the piece. Also while the
center gate is nice, it doesn't stand out as a gate, probably due
to two factors: The first being the lack of hinges and the second
is the shading torwards the center gives a rounded appearance like
an open book, rather than a closed gate.
A good piece in its own right, perhaps a little more feeling of
movement could be added as well.

Battle by Ravana

Good points: Good story telling in the picture, drawing your eye
from one pair of combatants to the next. A good imagination,
especially applied to the Xoran and Rajamalan characters and their
depiction. The addition of writing to help tell the story in
addition to the composition of the piece drives it home.
This artist has a firm grasp on the proportions of the human form
and the use of tasteful blending.

Needs improvement: What could really improve this sketch would be
the implementation of a more aggressive black/white/grey pattern
to differentiate between things such as skin and clothes. Also
this artist needs to work on perspective, citing the battle at
the front as an example, make the combatants larger since they are
closer. I suggest printing rather than using script for your
wording which makes the words easier to read at a glance, the
inclusion of a background would also improve this piece. All in
all good quality work, but I think you can go alot farther.

The Vine Bridge by Elsp

This piece I can't really say much about since I don't recognize
how it was created. All together well done piece, but it could
use more color and a more solid background since the piece seems
to be floating a bit. I'd love it if you could write me and let
me know how it was done, I'm dying to know. Great motion in it
and it's just interesting to stare at.


Eidella by Septerra

Good points: The attention to detail in this piece is striking,
as well as the good use of linework. The falcon and all of the
equipment was beautifully rendered on this figure. This is coupled
with some very nice shading, especially in the upper body.

Needs improvement: First let me point out one obvious mistake,
when the bowstring was added into this piece it was added in
straight, but a drawn bow (as this one is) has an angled draw
to it's bowstring leading back to the point at which the string
is held. Now I don't know who Eidella is, but it appears that
shrinking the head a little bit would make the entire body more
in proportion. Once again, this piece could do well with a
background and a little more black/white/grey patterning in it.
This artist needs to study the muscle placement of the human
figure a bit more too, because the forcept of her forearm should
cover her bicep when a bow is drawn. (Note: If the bow is not
drawn it shouldn't be as curved as it is and less than 1/8th of
the arrow would cross the distance between the string and the bow)


That would wrap it up for my first critique. Please take all my
comments in good faith, I mean no malice by this posting and seek
only to help improve the overall quality of work in Achaea.

- Dream Shadow

Penned by my hand on the 7th of Ero, in the year 281 AF.