Ugh, there have been alot of uptight posts on the public board recently, I believe some poetic relief is in order. (or disorder. 😉 hehe) This one is all original, written by me. Kona hon, surrender now. Muahahaha!

This is the story of a girl named Kaye Auss
So listen carefully please
As I recount to you the dreadful tale
Of Kaye's obsession with cheese

Now poor Kaye had an awful childhood
I'm terribly sorry to say
The other kids laughed and called her names
Cuz she sat there eating cheese everyday

Then one fine day when she was sixteen
She met a handsome fella
He was so sexy, sweet, and charming
She almost choked on her MOZZERELLA

He smiled and kissed the back of her hand
And said "My name is Mac."
She replied "Hello, my name is Kaye
And I love MONTEREY JACK."

Mac laughed and said he liked it too
But he knew something better
Kaye wondered what it was
And figured he must prefer CHEDDAR

So Kaye was more shocked than anyone else
When he leaned in and gave her a kiss
It would have been perfect if not for the fact
That she went and choked on her SWISS

Mac acted fast and saved her life
And Kaye knew her love for him was true
They would hold hands and gaze at the stars
While munching on tasty BLUE

When finally they were to be married
A huge wedding they did throw
Kaye waited at the altar
But Mac, he did not show

"Wait a bit longer" she told everyone
"I'm sure that he's just tardy"
But the guests didn't think that he'd ever arrive
As they silently chewed their HAVARDI

Hours later, once the guests had all left
Kaye realized Mac was gone
She went into a state of extreme depression
All she'd eat was dried PARMESAN

Her depression lasted for several years
Kaye was always in a bad mooda
Until one day she flung herself off a high cliff
While screaming about her fondness for GOUDA

So let this be a lesson
For you to spread o'er land and seas
Nothing good can ever happen
When all you eat is cheese

Thank you.
Lemon, The Poetic Genius once again 🙂

Penned by my hand on the 17th of Aeguary, in the year 242 AF.