Achaean News
The Official 'The Jesters are SOOOOOOOOOOO OLD' Qolour Cuiz
Written by: Saelily
Date: Wednesday, March 11th, 2026
Addressed to: Everyone
The CIJ, Harlequin Troupe and my own inability to obey rules are proud to bring you a silly quiz-game to celebrate the SEVEN HUNDREDTH YEAR OF (official) JESTERING!
Seven-hundred! If you're seven-hundred, you've surely accepted by now that you are either old, or in such a state of agelessness that youth does not apply to you (regardless of how glorious your hair and cuticles may still be). Age can certainly be an advantage in quizes, provided your memory is strong... yet tests of pointed acuity, speed and colour-precision often fade from our grasp as we age. It is for this reason, and in honour of the least sensible yet often most consistent Ancient House around, I present the least sensible form of hue-influenced quizzing I could conceive while remembering to ask questions: The Qolour Cuiz!
Q: Why?
A: Because the Jesters are OLD and Komos said I had to burn some of their money as an excuse to teach a valuable lesson. However, he did not specify the lesson (or teaching), which will in turn become the lesson for him! Let's show him!
Q: When?
A: The upcoming 22nd of Chronos, One Year before the Fall of Empires ((or 999 A.F.) (give or take a half-day for any sudden cataclysms, conquests or invasions.))
Q: Where?
A: Delos, so anyone can attend! More specifically the large tent on the north side of the legendarily overlooked Nameless Street of Delos.
Q: What?
A: Right?! I hate opening paragraphs and preambles too!
A Qolour Cuiz! The final scores of which will be divided evenly against the pot of sequestered Jesterly wealth, currently around three million gold.
Q: Why Colours?
A: I wrote Qolours. These are different, in that they are able to exist in a Q-state.
Note: A Q-state is when a colour is so close to being identical to another colour that difference can only be discerned by a peripheral glance, or "q-look" at said COLOURS.
Q: Why Cuiz?
A: Ask Komos, but don't because he'll just make up some inane story that makes my reasoning sound sensible! Alternatively, ask Zargoth. I've heard he gives fun answers to weird questions!
Q: Why Qolours?
A: The aforexplained COLOUR board of qolours will be used in our game, as both a critical component of the scoring system and the medium over which the players will commit a quizly tug-of-war. The specifics will be detailed on the day, but for a hint of how this foolishness might unfold: Each question will have a colour associated with it. The game will start with a single marker in the centre of the colour board. This will represent a small section of zero points. Correct answers will move this marker towards you a number of spaces (determined from said marker's distance from the nearest qolour of the question) corresponding with the order in which correct answers are given (the direction of this ordering to be determined by a coin flip). This will produce a point value for that question based on proximal colours, qolours and players who did not influence the pull of that particular marker in that particular movement, with values ranging from three to zero. Another marker will be added whenever a question goes unanswered, or because I feel like it, and follow the same rules as the first marker, along a ninety-degree shift. If the entire board becomes zeros, a sudden-death may occur, with ever devolving rules based entirely upon our collective inability to cooperate.
If this sounds like your kind of game, please send me a warning letter containing your name and a cup of kawhe before attending.
If this all sounds completely maddening, good! You are invited to play for free!
Q: ...What the heck are you on about today, Saelily? Translate please!!
A: I am hosting a peculiar version of a quiz loosely based upon Jester history that will involve both non-team-based collective play and a total inability to control the outcome, only your own potential score. The questions will range from very easy to definitively obscure and potentially (but not intentionally) impossible.
Correct answers will not be the sole mechanism to victory, so knowledge won't matter alone!
Being able to see the colours will not allow you game the mechanisms of the game, so colour-discernment won't matter alone!
There will likely be multiple victors, so if you matter, you might not be alone!
They will not feel like they won, so even the losers will have a sense of smug victory!
It'll be fun, unless you're the hopelessly competitive type!
Those sorts will, as usual, be able to blame others for our collectivised failure!
I hope to see you there!
Hugs,
Saelily
Supreme Harlequin Educator
Senior Advisor for Intelligence, Diplomacy and Secret Operations
Penned by my hand on the 5th of Lupar, in the year 999 AF.
The Official 'The Jesters are SOOOOOOOOOOO OLD' Qolour Cuiz
Written by: Saelily
Date: Wednesday, March 11th, 2026
Addressed to: Everyone
The CIJ, Harlequin Troupe and my own inability to obey rules are proud to bring you a silly quiz-game to celebrate the SEVEN HUNDREDTH YEAR OF (official) JESTERING!
Seven-hundred! If you're seven-hundred, you've surely accepted by now that you are either old, or in such a state of agelessness that youth does not apply to you (regardless of how glorious your hair and cuticles may still be). Age can certainly be an advantage in quizes, provided your memory is strong... yet tests of pointed acuity, speed and colour-precision often fade from our grasp as we age. It is for this reason, and in honour of the least sensible yet often most consistent Ancient House around, I present the least sensible form of hue-influenced quizzing I could conceive while remembering to ask questions: The Qolour Cuiz!
Q: Why?
A: Because the Jesters are OLD and Komos said I had to burn some of their money as an excuse to teach a valuable lesson. However, he did not specify the lesson (or teaching), which will in turn become the lesson for him! Let's show him!
Q: When?
A: The upcoming 22nd of Chronos, One Year before the Fall of Empires ((or 999 A.F.) (give or take a half-day for any sudden cataclysms, conquests or invasions.))
Q: Where?
A: Delos, so anyone can attend! More specifically the large tent on the north side of the legendarily overlooked Nameless Street of Delos.
Q: What?
A: Right?! I hate opening paragraphs and preambles too!
A Qolour Cuiz! The final scores of which will be divided evenly against the pot of sequestered Jesterly wealth, currently around three million gold.
Q: Why Colours?
A: I wrote Qolours. These are different, in that they are able to exist in a Q-state.
Note: A Q-state is when a colour is so close to being identical to another colour that difference can only be discerned by a peripheral glance, or "q-look" at said COLOURS.
Q: Why Cuiz?
A: Ask Komos, but don't because he'll just make up some inane story that makes my reasoning sound sensible! Alternatively, ask Zargoth. I've heard he gives fun answers to weird questions!
Q: Why Qolours?
A: The aforexplained COLOUR board of qolours will be used in our game, as both a critical component of the scoring system and the medium over which the players will commit a quizly tug-of-war. The specifics will be detailed on the day, but for a hint of how this foolishness might unfold: Each question will have a colour associated with it. The game will start with a single marker in the centre of the colour board. This will represent a small section of zero points. Correct answers will move this marker towards you a number of spaces (determined from said marker's distance from the nearest qolour of the question) corresponding with the order in which correct answers are given (the direction of this ordering to be determined by a coin flip). This will produce a point value for that question based on proximal colours, qolours and players who did not influence the pull of that particular marker in that particular movement, with values ranging from three to zero. Another marker will be added whenever a question goes unanswered, or because I feel like it, and follow the same rules as the first marker, along a ninety-degree shift. If the entire board becomes zeros, a sudden-death may occur, with ever devolving rules based entirely upon our collective inability to cooperate.
If this sounds like your kind of game, please send me a warning letter containing your name and a cup of kawhe before attending.
If this all sounds completely maddening, good! You are invited to play for free!
Q: ...What the heck are you on about today, Saelily? Translate please!!
A: I am hosting a peculiar version of a quiz loosely based upon Jester history that will involve both non-team-based collective play and a total inability to control the outcome, only your own potential score. The questions will range from very easy to definitively obscure and potentially (but not intentionally) impossible.
Correct answers will not be the sole mechanism to victory, so knowledge won't matter alone!
Being able to see the colours will not allow you game the mechanisms of the game, so colour-discernment won't matter alone!
There will likely be multiple victors, so if you matter, you might not be alone!
They will not feel like they won, so even the losers will have a sense of smug victory!
It'll be fun, unless you're the hopelessly competitive type!
Those sorts will, as usual, be able to blame others for our collectivised failure!
I hope to see you there!
Hugs,
Saelily
Supreme Harlequin Educator
Senior Advisor for Intelligence, Diplomacy and Secret Operations
Penned by my hand on the 5th of Lupar, in the year 999 AF.