Hail, Twin Lords, Lords of Oppression and Suffering.

Never, in my entire life, I asked You for anything, my Lords, until now.
The time has come when the bonds of my oaths to You and Your City need
to be torn and it is only You who have the power to do it.

Those oaths are deemed worthless now in Mhaldor, swept down the city
sewers and forgotten, proclaiming them aloud got me branded a traitor
and cast out. And yet, they mean everything to me, every single word is
burned into my soul for eternity and only You can gouge them out.

As it stands now, I am not able to bring myself to do what is demanded
of me. I am not able to pledge myself to Lady Keresis, pledge to spread
Her teaching across the land and give Her my soul in death. My soul has
already been given to You, my Lords in its entirety, there is nothing
left to pledge to anyone else. And while I have full respect for Lady
Vengeance, I don't see Her path leading to strength I yearn for, nor
toward power I was promised to gain by following Your Seven Truths. I
see Vengeance as a mortal distraction in my struggle for greatness, just
like mortal need for Justice or Love or Sin would be.

By reciting my pledge to Her I would be betraying not only myself, but
You, my Masters. I would be lying. My soul would shatter, I would become
naught but a worthless husk, spineless maggot unfit to serve anyone.

In my pathetic mortal mind I am also not able to accept that Evil Power
can be shared with anyone. My soul screams that Evil devours others
ruthlessly, that Evil never shares His powers, but that is another topic
altogether.

I need to continue on the path that started for me over 80 years ago,
advancing towards personal greatness promised in Truth One. That path
until now was Yours.

Numerous moments in my life stand out from the daily grind, imparting
Your Truth and Your teachings on me in a very forceful manner, unfurling
Your path in front of me, demanding that I make the next step.

There was a powerful moment of my first Logosmas, when I was only 6 and
a half. The very first drops of Your essence entered my fractured soul
and I understood in some primitive, childish way what true greatness is
all about. The yearning for that greatness has awakened within me that
night and it has not left me since. The greatest Logosmas gift.

Another moment came during my Trial of Rebirth. I saw Your Power, I
experienced the brutality of Your Truth, cold, unforgiving, pitiless,
uncompromising Truth in all its intensity. My yearning responded with
eagerness leading me to Mhaldor, my one and only City. Your City.

Another unforgettable moment happened in Your Temple. I saw Your most
sacred tome, pulsing there like a living heart drawn from the bowels of
Hell. Its pages soaked with dark fluid, dripping and pooling on the
ground and Your Words carefully penned by Your scribe were expounding on
the meaning of Your Truths. I was thirsty again. Soaking in every word I
realized that my soul and my mind were responding not only to the
scribed words, but my mortal heart was beating in rhythm with the
pulsing pages. I knew the words, every single one, those were already
mine, already carved deep into my soul, already yearning for the Power
the words were promising.

A drop of dark liquid dripped from the edge of the altar and when it
reached my hand a sudden jolt sent me down to my knees trembling
violently. The liquid was cold and sharp raking my skin like a giant
claw. Another drop touched my face, scratching its way down to my lips.
Melded with my own blood it forced its way into my mouth. Chocking me,
it slowly expanded and pushed its way up my skull reaching my horrified
mind.

My mind shifted under immense pressure and I realized that it was not
blood at all, it was the Essence of Your teaching that was oozing from
the pages on the altar. The scribed words were meant for the puny mortal
brains to catch but a glimpse of Your Truth. But it is the Essence of
Evil, not merely the words, that needs to enter our existence to make
our life fully sentient, so we not only recite but live every single
word of the Truths. We need strength to rip open our mortal existence,
existence full of fears, apprehensions and insignificant mortal
concerns. We need strength to rip off the shackles of crippling
conscience and morals, to tear out all emotions and other worldly
attachments from our mortal frames. Only then the Essence of Evil, the
Power of Evil can triumph within us and across the land. And lead us to
and beyond the gates of true freedom and exaltation, beyond the gates of
Hell, to the promised land.

It is You, Masters, who allowed me to live all those moments in their
full glory. You have opened my eyes and my mind so I would hunger for
more, yearn for the next step.

This is the Path I need to follow, this is the Path that is beaconing
me. To follow it now with integrity and strength I need to receive Your
gift of freedom from my Oaths.

Please grant it to me, Masters. Please, do not have me reduced to a
worthless, spineless, dishonourable maggot.

Unless, of course, that is Your Divine Will, then I have no choice but
to obey without further hesitation.

Respectfully

Tyehr
On the path of Seven Truth for eternity.

Penned by my hand on the 17th of Valnuary, in the year 606 AF.