Dearest Ayrh,

You are a cool drop in my steamy and chaotic life. You bring me pleasure
and make me comfortable enough not to bathe. The way your socks are
droopy, the way your backside is large, I don't know what else I could
ask for except to tell you that I love you so much and I want a roast
beef sandwich.

Yours truly,
Tekk

Penned by my hand on the 21st of Lupar, in the year 427 AF.