Hello again, Stressed Ones.

Today we shall try a new form of meditation, for peace and silence will
not always be with you when you wish to relieve the bonds of being
overworked that bind you, much like the Savannah Cow chews the grass so
stealthily that you do not notice him until he has taken a bite of your
mutton. And then the mutton is become nasty, and no one really wants to
eat mutton that's been munched on by a cow.

Perhaps not the best analogy, but you may find that it makes an
astounding amount of sense when put into context.

Today's meditation process will be strenuous, for you will not only have
to think hard, but you must now also work out your stresses.

Let us begin by performing a stance feared and misunderstood by much of
Sapience, the Headstand. You may find a good amount of difficulty in
achieving this titanic attempt, but it must be done if the stress is to
be removed from your weary bones.

To help take your mind off that of the task of keeping your balance in
the dreaded Headstand, let us think of something soothing.

Oo, look, pretty cuddly bird.

Hello pretty cuddly bird, you are my friend.

I would like to pet you, and feed you some birdseed.

Let us also look upon furry wolfy buddy.

Hello furry wolfy buddy, your tummy is rubbable. Would you mind terribly
if I rubbed your tummy, furry wolfy buddy?

Envision yourself doing something soothing, something like what has been
mentioned, and you will find yet another path to true stress relief.

Today's Thought For Food is the Ways of the Pirate. Those who have been
on a trek through the Isle of Mysia have have heard certain things
during their tenure there, things such as 'Argh', 'Yarr', 'Shiver Me
Timbers', and 'Swashbuckling'.


Shiver Me Timbers
This innocent seeming phrase is actually a little known piratey
innuendo. An amusing anecdote, suffice to say that the cold is no
deterrent for a pirate where it counts for some.

Swashbuckling
There has been much debate as to whether those who garner the name of
Swashbuckler Swash Buckles or Buckle Swashes. Whichever the case may be,
Swashbuckler has become commonly referred to as a term for those who are
most excellent in the arts of combat, a Swash being a Swagger, and a
Buckler being...a Buckler. Why such people put special emphasis on belt
buckles, weak shields, and unclear innuendo is as of yet unknown. But it
does give us Thought For Food.

Argh
This, along with Yarr, are perhaps the two most commonly heard piratey
phrases. The most accurately found definition of Argh is 'to express a
feeling of great displeasure, to express negative sentiments, to desire
another beer'. Cryptic as it is, this word is often confused with Yarr,
for all they sound alike.

Yarr
Another common word of the pirate dictionary, as it were, this term has
been found to mean most often in particular to mean 'Hello, Goodbye,
Yes, No, Depends on how I feel, Go away I'm drunk'. The context of the
question requiring response requires special attention, ast this will
usually tell you which of the meanings is inferred.
This word has been commonly heard in conjunction with 'Ye be a pretty
wench'. In mildly translated terms, this comes to mean, 'Hello, my good
lady. I found myself walking by on this good day, and could not help but
notice that you look extremely beautiful, so much so that I could not
help but comment.'
The beauty of the language of the Pirate is so much so that it can be
elegantly done in minutes.


This brings our discussion for the day to a close.

You may now ease yourself out of the Headstand, and commend yourself for
having such extraordinary balance and control.

Be at ease, be at rest, and be less stressed. For the machinations of
Dubber Rucky are many, but the ways of Rubber Ducky are strong.

Kuntar Semshan, Kiella's Kneekisser.

Penned by my hand on the 8th of Miraman, in the year 391 AF.