....Or: Ridding Actar of the pestilence that is GOAT!


Well I'm sure you think this to be insane, honestly who writes about
slaying goats. In the past countless pages have been filled with the
stories of dauntless heroes who slay such things as dragons or evil
villains, but these great deeds pale in comparison to those of the
overlooked goat harvester. Most of Achaea believes goats to be fun
loving creatures only interested in eating grass and sleeping, but I
know the truth behind these monsterous beasts. Goats talk to each other,
constantly. Seriously, you think those annoying sounds are just due to
goats having an inferior larynx? Why thats just ubsurd, how could you
not notice the truth behind these awful noises? Those "noises" are
actually very complex rhyming schemes in which goats have mastered. By
combining nearly similar noises into one long bah goats speak to each
other in a code I like to call Goades (goat/codes, combine them eh?).
Yes, yes, I Aerdun have deciphered these intricate sounds after
countless years (3) of studying. I have slept with goats, bathed with
goats, ate with goats, and even pasted white little hairs to my body to
attain the impression that I was in fact one with the goats. Would you
like to know what I found these goats to say after I finally mastered
their voice? ALL THEY TALK ABOUT IS EATING GRASS AND SLEEPING! Those
wretched goats tricked me into believing them to be complex creatures
with complex plans to take over all of Sapience, and after 3 years of
making a complete fool out of myself they finally drive the nail into
the coffin by showing me how un-complex they really are. From this day
forward let no goat be spared lest they turn on you just like they did
me!

Penned by my hand on the 19th of Chronos, in the year 354 AF.