Hail, Sapience

The following text is a transcript of the Quite Silly Baptism conducted
just a ways over there, last Tuesday, by some crazy old coot whose name
escapes me. I haven't really redacted anything, 'cause I'm far too lazy,
but we can all pretend like I did.

I post this with permission of the Village Idiot of Bopalopia and the
Disgruntled Penguin Master of the Moron Club.

I hope this will be glazed over like the rest of these long annoying
posts.

For the greater glory of Humor,
And everyone's lack thereof.

-------------------

Old Coot says "What're you all doing on my property?"

Old Coot says, "I'm glad to see so many of you have lost contact with
reality enough to bother listening to me."

Old Coot says, "Due to the large number of you here and my unnecessary
verbosity, this will be an extremely drawn out exercise in futility."

Old Coot says, "So anyway, lets get this over with."

Old Coot stand ready to perform the rites of the Silly.

Old Coot pulls out a shiny red cloth and drapes it over a random tree
stump, as the cloth touches the tree stump, nothing special happens,
'cause its just a cloth and stump.

Old Coot takes a vial of a black liquid from his coat pocket.

Old Coot pours the vial into a bowl, but then decides to repeat the
whole process of making the liquid so everyone can watch and feel
important.

Old Coot takes 5 ice cubes, melts them in his hands, grinning the whole
time as though he's a miracle worker because he has body heat and lets
the liquid drip into a bowl.

Old Coot holds up a beaver skull, that he found in the woods a few days
back and decided to hang unto just in case he wanted to seem dark and
ominous.

Old Coot says "Oh lord, we stand before you today in the hopes of
getting these young'uns to loose any semblance of humor, happiness and
reason they may have left in them so they'll do our bidding. Let's hope
they don't make anymore decisions as bad as the one they made to come
here today."

Old Coot says "Kneel, or else"

<<Kneeling>>

Old Coot says "Simpleton #1, do you wish to wash away what little
logical thought your warped mind might have left?"

Simpleton #1 says "Yep"

Old Coot pours the water in the bowl over Simpleton #1 and, when no one
is looking, knocks him over the head a few times with an iron club.
Simpleton #1 finds that suddenly this all makes a bit more sense, having
lost his last three functioning brain cells in the clubbing.

Repeat for Simpletons #2-100.

Any resemblance of this post to any others is purely coincidental, all
characters involved are purely fictional regardless of any resemblance
to real life people.


Penned by my hand on the 21st of Miraman, in the year 347 AF.