Wise, to not call Clementius
By names other than what he meant us
To call him by, else we die,
Fry, or even electrify.

I'd rather have fingers than toes
Rather have eyes than a nose,
As for hair, I'm glad it's still there,
I'll be awfully sad when it goes.

Now, I have an intelligence of four,
My staffcasts do about fourty-four,
My mana's about fourty-hundred-and-fourty-four,
My health's not even four-thousand-four-hundred-and-fourty-four.

I intended today, to take to the hay,
Fairies, Deathknights, while I play,
Now, I fear I am little more,
than a child with his hand in a door.

So please, lord, listen to this,
Have mercy upon a foolish mortal,
Allow me to kill, hit and miss,
Nearly die, and desperately portal.

The gods know, I even tried,
To use a gem of Transmutation,
to cheat the tide,
To stop my heart's palpitation,
Instead I give you my salutation,
And offer to decrease UW's population
Via heart-poputation.

Oh, no, woe is me,
restore to me
my body, please.

Penned by my hand on the 3rd of Chronos, in the year 430 AF.