WARNING: This poem contains MATURE and SUGGESTIVE content in a humourous
setting. That means if you can't handle the maturity of it, then DO NOT
READ IT.



This is Dedicated to Drafox and (apparently) his father Atavan.
(According to Drafox)


When I was a young lad I used to like girls,
I'd play with their corsets and fondle their curls.
'Till one day, my lady I caught with some churl,
Now you'd never get treated that way by a shrub.

Shrubbery, shrubbery, I love my shrubbery!
I've never had anything quite like a shrub.
I've had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I've never had anything quite like a shrub.

Now when I'm in need of a very good pound,
I go to my door and get me some ground.
I plant a few seeds and wait a few days,
Till my greenery abounds in decorative displays!

Trees are all right on Saturday night,
Thorn bushes are scary, they puts up a fight.
But it's just not the same when you slam your beef,
As the feeling you get when you humps with a leaf.

Shrubbery, shrubbery, I love my shrubbery!
I've never had anything quite like a shrub.
I've had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I've never had anything quite like a shrub.

I've done it with bushes with long flowery petals,
I'd do it with palms if it weren't for their nettles.
I've done it with fig, a spruce, and some scrub,
But it's just not the same when you hump with a shrub.

Now that I'm old and advanced in my years,
I look back on my life and shed me no tears.
As I sit with green thumb and give it a rub,
Playing Hide-The-Salami with my favorite shrub!

Shrubbery, shrubbery, I love my shrubbery!
I've never had anything quite like a shrub.
I've had lots of lovers, my life has been loose,
But I've never had anything quite like a shrub.


[ DISCLAIMER: Please note that this is for FUN. It is in NO WAY SERIOUS.
Take it with a grain of salt and laugh a little. ]

- Arc DeMonet

Penned by my hand on the 18th of Ero, in the year 380 AF.