Achaean News

Previous Article | Back to News Summary | Next Article
Public News Post #20343

Dear Jonesey

Written by: Director Jonesey Corder
Date: Friday, January 11th, 2019
Addressed to: Everyone


Welcome to out latest episode of Dear Jonesey, as always remember to please include 1 golden sovereign in your letters to me. This isn't a charity. Sounds like this has been a great service to some of you with solving your problems and I look forward to doing my part to make Sapience great again.


NEXT!!

You read what is written on an elegant white letter:
Dear Jonesey,

Since I was a young warrior, I have been on a quest to be the best. Be
it the best at drinking, fighting, even dancing, I wish to be the best.
To some, it may be a simple task. To others, such as myself, we will not
be happy until we reach the sign at the end of the path that tells us
there is nothing else. Nothing else to attain, no further to go.
I was wondering about one of the steps in my plan. Godhood, which could
be one of the final steps on my quest to power. People claim it to be
impossible, yet I disagree. For all I know, there is no upper limit.
What do you have to say about this? Is it a valid goal to have, even
though it will likely take my entire lifetime to accomplish? Is it worth
my time, are these doubts that plague my head correct?

Your friend,
He Who Is of Power


Dear He Who Is of Power,

Being the best is a noble goal, everyone should be trying to strive for this as an outcome. That being said its lonely at the top, trust me I know. Being the best at everything ever done is hard, but I know if I do not no one else can. Nothing is impossible, even Godhood. The question is are you worthy?

The short answer is no, otherwise you wouldn't be asking me for advise, you would already be there. To attain Godhood you must be deemed worthy first and then from there changes must happen beyond the scope of out understanding. I can promise you this, if you do not try and fully submerge yourself in your task, you will NEVER reach your goal. The only chance you get is to give it all you have and strive for excellence.



NEXT!!!!!


You read what is written on an elegant white letter:
Dear Jonesey,

I just love your advice, so lets see if you can help me with my problem. I am infatuated with a family member, tho they are related only by marriage. I cared for him way before he married my other family member. Yet lately we have been hanging out more often due to our spouses not being awake as much as they used to be. We had a nice and quiet dinner, where things took a turn for the more intimate. I love my spouse and he loves his, what should I do. I don't want to lose the friendship we have but these emotions are also real.

-More than just friends?


Dear -More than just friends?

Thank you for your kind words, I am the best at giving advice so I understand why you have turned to me. The best things in life aren't for you. The forbiden fruit is the most delicious. There are a few courses of action that you can take. Lets go over these scenarios before chosing the best.

A. Cheat- lies and deceit are the driving factor. When you see your spouses you go on with your lives, but when they aren't around you have an alternative life.

B. Open marriage- this lets you to be intimate with others with your spouses consent. Sometimes, just being aware of what you are doing is enough for your spouse to not feel like you are cheating since you are being honest.

C. Divorce- It's over, seriously where did the love go. There is no reason to be lonely and miserable anymore and its time to pursue your happiness.

D. Suicide- What is the greatest end to a love story? Death of course. Just kill yourself and that guilty feelings goes away and then you won't have to make a decision.

E. Stop it- Marriage is serious business, you gave yourself a commitment for life, regardless if things are good or bad. Contacts matter and if you can't abide by this most serious of contracts, how can you be trusted for lesser things.

F. Murder- You kill his spouse, he kills your spouse, everyone (not your spouses) wins.

Well of these options, D is probably not what you were looking to hear, and you probably know enough to know E is obvious. C leads to a clear future, but what if they are not ready to divorce their spouse? Then you are a fool who took a chance on love. You don't have to phyiscally engage in sex for A to happen, romance alone can be cheating and I feel you are already guilty of this. Option B gives you a chance to bake, ice and eat your cake. You get everything out of there, but your current spouses might not feel the same way, which brings us to option F. Get rid of all your problems in a fell swoop.

Whenever my wife isn't around, I just complaint to everyone who wants to listen and whine until she one day appears. My advise to you is to tie your spouse up the next time they appear so they can never leave. If they are locked in your basement, you won't miss them anymore or feel lonely.




NEXT!!!!!!!

You read what is written on an elegant white letter:
Dearest Jonesey,

I have a confession to make. I've been an admirer of yours for a long time, you have always had your eye on others tho, but still we have talked on occassion and gotten to know each other. I'd love to express my feelings face to face but alas that would be a bad idea more than likely. Or, would it be a good one?? Only you can say.

An Admirer from Afar

Dear An Admirer from Afar,

Of course you admire me, every single being admirers me, its not your fault its my own. I am too awesome, born of perfection and you cannot resist me. I am sorry that I have done this to you and I hope you can forgive me. Come meet me, tell me how you feel, show me on the doll. I am sure we can come to an accord on how to move forward from here. I think obtaining sweet sweet release will help you to move forward with your life. Only I can help you.





This wraps up this episode of Dear Jonesey, I hope you have all learnt something and are able to live better lives. Remember, if you dont know, ask yourself, "What Would Jonesey Do".

Penned by my hand on the 17th of Phaestian, in the year 790 AF.


Previous Article | Back to News Summary | Next Article
Previous | Summary | Next
Public News Post #20343

Dear Jonesey

Written by: Director Jonesey Corder
Date: Friday, January 11th, 2019
Addressed to: Everyone


Welcome to out latest episode of Dear Jonesey, as always remember to please include 1 golden sovereign in your letters to me. This isn't a charity. Sounds like this has been a great service to some of you with solving your problems and I look forward to doing my part to make Sapience great again.


NEXT!!

You read what is written on an elegant white letter:
Dear Jonesey,

Since I was a young warrior, I have been on a quest to be the best. Be
it the best at drinking, fighting, even dancing, I wish to be the best.
To some, it may be a simple task. To others, such as myself, we will not
be happy until we reach the sign at the end of the path that tells us
there is nothing else. Nothing else to attain, no further to go.
I was wondering about one of the steps in my plan. Godhood, which could
be one of the final steps on my quest to power. People claim it to be
impossible, yet I disagree. For all I know, there is no upper limit.
What do you have to say about this? Is it a valid goal to have, even
though it will likely take my entire lifetime to accomplish? Is it worth
my time, are these doubts that plague my head correct?

Your friend,
He Who Is of Power


Dear He Who Is of Power,

Being the best is a noble goal, everyone should be trying to strive for this as an outcome. That being said its lonely at the top, trust me I know. Being the best at everything ever done is hard, but I know if I do not no one else can. Nothing is impossible, even Godhood. The question is are you worthy?

The short answer is no, otherwise you wouldn't be asking me for advise, you would already be there. To attain Godhood you must be deemed worthy first and then from there changes must happen beyond the scope of out understanding. I can promise you this, if you do not try and fully submerge yourself in your task, you will NEVER reach your goal. The only chance you get is to give it all you have and strive for excellence.



NEXT!!!!!


You read what is written on an elegant white letter:
Dear Jonesey,

I just love your advice, so lets see if you can help me with my problem. I am infatuated with a family member, tho they are related only by marriage. I cared for him way before he married my other family member. Yet lately we have been hanging out more often due to our spouses not being awake as much as they used to be. We had a nice and quiet dinner, where things took a turn for the more intimate. I love my spouse and he loves his, what should I do. I don't want to lose the friendship we have but these emotions are also real.

-More than just friends?


Dear -More than just friends?

Thank you for your kind words, I am the best at giving advice so I understand why you have turned to me. The best things in life aren't for you. The forbiden fruit is the most delicious. There are a few courses of action that you can take. Lets go over these scenarios before chosing the best.

A. Cheat- lies and deceit are the driving factor. When you see your spouses you go on with your lives, but when they aren't around you have an alternative life.

B. Open marriage- this lets you to be intimate with others with your spouses consent. Sometimes, just being aware of what you are doing is enough for your spouse to not feel like you are cheating since you are being honest.

C. Divorce- It's over, seriously where did the love go. There is no reason to be lonely and miserable anymore and its time to pursue your happiness.

D. Suicide- What is the greatest end to a love story? Death of course. Just kill yourself and that guilty feelings goes away and then you won't have to make a decision.

E. Stop it- Marriage is serious business, you gave yourself a commitment for life, regardless if things are good or bad. Contacts matter and if you can't abide by this most serious of contracts, how can you be trusted for lesser things.

F. Murder- You kill his spouse, he kills your spouse, everyone (not your spouses) wins.

Well of these options, D is probably not what you were looking to hear, and you probably know enough to know E is obvious. C leads to a clear future, but what if they are not ready to divorce their spouse? Then you are a fool who took a chance on love. You don't have to phyiscally engage in sex for A to happen, romance alone can be cheating and I feel you are already guilty of this. Option B gives you a chance to bake, ice and eat your cake. You get everything out of there, but your current spouses might not feel the same way, which brings us to option F. Get rid of all your problems in a fell swoop.

Whenever my wife isn't around, I just complaint to everyone who wants to listen and whine until she one day appears. My advise to you is to tie your spouse up the next time they appear so they can never leave. If they are locked in your basement, you won't miss them anymore or feel lonely.




NEXT!!!!!!!

You read what is written on an elegant white letter:
Dearest Jonesey,

I have a confession to make. I've been an admirer of yours for a long time, you have always had your eye on others tho, but still we have talked on occassion and gotten to know each other. I'd love to express my feelings face to face but alas that would be a bad idea more than likely. Or, would it be a good one?? Only you can say.

An Admirer from Afar

Dear An Admirer from Afar,

Of course you admire me, every single being admirers me, its not your fault its my own. I am too awesome, born of perfection and you cannot resist me. I am sorry that I have done this to you and I hope you can forgive me. Come meet me, tell me how you feel, show me on the doll. I am sure we can come to an accord on how to move forward from here. I think obtaining sweet sweet release will help you to move forward with your life. Only I can help you.





This wraps up this episode of Dear Jonesey, I hope you have all learnt something and are able to live better lives. Remember, if you dont know, ask yourself, "What Would Jonesey Do".

Penned by my hand on the 17th of Phaestian, in the year 790 AF.


Previous | Summary | Next